Hang In There

California Brown LizardThere have been multiple times in the last several years when I’ve almost given up because this writing thing as too frustrating, too hard. Other people made it look so easy, and I couldn’t seem wrap my head around the simplest things.

I think one of the biggest dangers comes when a writer sits in isolation and tries to, well, write. Without feedback and just honest conversation with other writers about their work and process, you only have the doubts in your own head echoing off each other.

A couple weekends ago, my critique partner and I took a face-to-face writing day. We usually just toss stuff back and forth in email, but we’re lucky enough to live close enough that this was feasible. The next weekend, I attended a special workshop for my RWA chapter here in town. These two events recharged my writing energy and enthusiasm better than months on twitter where I’ve pretty much surrounded myself with other writers.

Why? Well, honestly, because both my CP, Dara Young and my RWA chapter rock. But also because I was interacting instead of just reacting or listening to my own doubts. These people told me things about myself and my writing because I asked the right questions. Social media is way too often used for “me, me, me” and we’re only human, so it’s expected. The goldmines can be found where you can find someone willing to sit down and hold an honest conversation that benefits you both.

If you have yet to find that spot where you feel comfortable hanging out, be patient. Try out a few different places and ask questions. Romance writers are some of the nicest people you could ever meet. Don’t be scared to comment on a blog because you don’t personally know the blogger. They won’t bite. Well, some might, but you have to ask them nicely first. My point is, you might just find a hangout that suits you where you least expect it. Stepping outside your comfort zone gets easier each time you push yourself.

What are you doing to stop clinging to your safe boundaries and put yourself out there?

ME? I’m blogging more often again, made a submission to a literary agency, have become more active again on the forums at Romance Divas, and am trying to talk to more people I meet out in the social media sphere. Feel free to look me up on Facebook, Twitter, or Google+, or even Flickr and say hi because like Kristen Lamb says, “We are not alone.”

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4 Comments

  1. OMG! You crazy woman! You are such a good writer and we need to get together more often in person. It WAS a lot of fun. And by the way…you totally rock too! (((Hugs)))

    1. Next one is beside YOUR pool. It looks fantabulous: the best of both worlds: man cave & poolside villa!

      I spent the time waiting for DS & his friend at Yu-Gi-Oh tourney, working on bones for a new story. Hope to start putting down new words this coming week.

  2. I definitely need to find a couple of crit partners. It’s a scary process. Finding the right one or two is like trying to find a spouse! And I missed the workshop because I had to work and that was upsetting. I enjoy the interaction with other authors. We all have so much in common no matter what genre we write.

    1. Thanks for stopping by, Angela! Finding a CP can be scary, but I think I lucked out. Don’t tell Dara (*wink*), but I’d been keeping an eye on her critique style on a forum we both shared before answering her post for a CP.

      Hopefully you won’t have to work for the potluck in August! Hope to see you there.

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