Thursday Thirteen: Morning Delays

ByKristen Koster

 

13 Ways My Kids Make Us Late

 

I hate to be late. I hate to feel like someone else is waiting on me. I hate to sit around waiting for someone else. My kids drive me nuts in the mornings before school. I’d had a nice relaxing stretch of sleeping in well past 6:00 am and I’m sure DH appreciated the silence that reigned for the nine weeks of summer. Anyway, here’s 13 ways in which my kids drag their heels and when they all pile up in a single morning, it’s a disaster on all fronts.

The elementary school starts at 8:15, but they don’t open the gates until 7:55. This means 700+ kids have 20 minutes to get into the school. The middle school starts at 8:30, but the first bell rings at 8:20. Did I also mention that they’re also about 4 miles apart with about 8 stoplights between them? DD has a lot farther to walk from her drop off point and DS complains if he has to walk from the street up the hill from the school.

13. I’m tired and/or cold!
I hate this one. It makes me sound exactly like my mother. At least I haven’t turned their mattress up on end so it’s perpendicular to their beds with them in it. Get up, get dressed, get moving.
12. Lost Clothing
Socks, shoes, clothing, glasses — either the favorite, must-have-nothing-else-will-do item is gone forever or everything is dirty — did I not ask them to bring them down Saturday morning, afternoon, evening and again on Sunday?
11. I’m sick. No, really!
Popular symptoms at our house: headaches, dizziness, sore muscles and nausea. Then they try to take their temperature as many times as possible even if they’ve already eaten, just to make sure it hasn’t miraculously crept up over the magic 100.4 degrees that will keep them home.
10. Sudden Breakfast/Lunch Indecision
Why, when they’ve eaten the same thing day in and day out for months, as soon as they’re running the slightest bit late, do they decide they don’t want the usual? This heading also covers the “But I want _______” when that’s the one thing I didn’t buy on the last trip to the grocery store because someone left the box on the shelf and I didn’t realize it was empty.
9. Screens and Other Shiny Objects
Televisions, nintendo games, youtube videos… so much more interesting than whatever mom’s going on about.
8. You never told me to do that!
Yes I did… see previous entry for why you tuned it out.
7. Breakfast/Lunch Refusal
This is tied closely to the one about indecision. After you make what they asked for, or at least didn’t object to when you asked, they pitch a fit about it and refuse to eat it. In the case of lunch, the answer is “Ok, it’s either this or a yogurt plate. It’s too late to make a second lunch now. Perhaps you’d like to make your own from now on?”
6. Lost School Supplies
Backpacks, books, homework, important papers that must be returned today, and did you write that check, Mom? Why do we ask if everything’s together the night before and then believe them when they say “Yeah.”
5. Shrinking Backpacks
Not everything under the sun will fit in it, trust me. It really won’t kill you to carry your lunch in one hand, really.
4. What do you mean you’re out of insulin?!
This is DD’s specialty. It always seems on the mornings I oversleep or get distracted by shiny objects myself, that her insulin pump needs changed. This usually is realized when she goes to bolus for breakfast.
3. Where’s my _________? I need it today.
This goes along with Lost Items, but it’s more specialized because it can occur after they’ve found the item in question. Standard answers are: I don’t know, it wasn’t my turn to watch it. The last place you had it? The master bedroom is not your personal locker. The bathroom is really not an appropriate storage location either.
2. Never-Ending Sibling Argument, Round #1298708912345
It really doesn’t matter who’s stupider, Fred or Josh, they both are annoying. If you spent more time worrying about what you’re supposed to be doing, instead of stopping to argue about stuff that doesn’t matter in the grand scope of life, you would be ready on time and you wouldn’t have woken your father up.
1. Wait, I forgot something!
Once you finally get in the car… or even get the garage door closed once you’ve back out of it… one of them invariably remembers something they needed but forgot to grab on the way out. Shoes, lunch, books, papers, you name it, they’ve spaced it.

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!

1 SandyCarlson 2 Savannah Chase 3 Bernie
4 Nadia Lee 5 Stephanie Sullivan 6 Tempest Knight
7 yasmin 8 Nina Pierce 9 Inez Kelley
10 Jennifer McKenzie 11 Paige Tyler 12 Jenny
13 Kristi 14 Savvy 15 Kelly
16 jenn 17 18

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24 Comments

  1. Ahhhh, the joys of motherhood. I guess this is what I have to look forward too when my little one starts school. LOL!! Great TT!

  4. All of these are soooo familiar. I think most kids try these things.

    #4 is my favorite – or I should say least favorite. My youngest has to take ADHD meds so it’s happened more than once that he’s forgotten to tell us he ran out. Usually he (or my 24 year old daughter who gets him off to school for me as she’s home then and I have to go to work much earlier than he leaves for school – she also oversees his medicine intake in the am) mentions it late the night before which is still bad but thank God for all night pharmacies. But sometimes, they wait until I’m well on the way to the day job.

    My T13 is scheduled to post at 12:01 AM EST Thursday.

  7. <<>>

    I sooo hear you on that! One of my friends and my sister are both habitually late. Doing anything with both of them can be a complete disaster. Hope the kids get their mornings together soon!

  12. Wow! Those sound so familiar! They make you want to bang your head against the wall!

  13. Gee, and I thought I was going to be alone!

    We’ve only done that one a few times, Tempest, but it hasn’t generally been something that’s made us run late. I will admit to signing reading logs in the car at a stop light because they were finishing their reading from the night before in the car.

  15. OMG! You hit them all! My youngest of three is a senior this year. I don’t have to worry about most of that anymore. Though he has asked me to run the English paper still sitting on the printer up to the high school. Ummm, yeah, I’m not very happy when he does that! 😀

  18. OMG!!! We did EVERY ONE OF THESE this morning. Except the insulin one.
    It drives me NUTS. I get up at 5am so that I am all ready to go to work (this week only) and don’t have to worry about my stuff.
    I have to get them up at 6 or 6:30 or I’ll never get them out the door to catch the bus at 7:40.
    They’re BOYS. Isn’t that supposed to be easier? Sheesh.

  20. For us it was always the same reason, boy eats breakfast too slow and has to eat due to metabolism disorder. We actually got a letter from the principal last year for it happening too many times. We’ll hopefully do better this year. Good luck. Happy T13.

  21. I am so glad my days of this are over. My favorite answer for number 3 was always “I don’t know. The last time I wore them (or had it), I put it back where it belongs.” Especially effective when they are looking for shoes… ’cause then their response was, “but, Mom, you don’t wear my shoes.” Yep.. my point exactly!!

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